I walked on grass today...

I walked on grass today.

At lunch, Tommy and Ty decided to go to this little Chinese Cafe right over next door to the church. I had to stay around a couple of minutes and do a thing, but when I was done, I was going to catch up with them. They went in Tommy's truck, but it's not that far, so I decided to walk.

I can't remember the last time I just walked.

I get so busy, and there are so many exciting things to do indoors. DVR, DSL, PS2, Digital Cable. I hardly even spend any time outside anymore. I remember when I was a kid, that my after-school time consisted of catching crawfish in the ditch in front of my house, or riding bikes to nowhere in particular with the other kids, playing baseball with a tennis ball and one base, or playing this game I invented in the front yard, where the object was to trip people and step on their toes. I love that game. Even if you lost - you fell down in the grass.

Today was such a pretty day, sunny and a little overcast and neither hot nor cold. I knew I was going to eat well, so the walk would do me good in advance (even though it's hardly far enough). Why walk when I could have just as easily driven? I guess that's exactly why. It's just as easy to drive. They are the same trouble. Only - walking is more enjoyable. And better for you. And cheaper. So I walked.

But even as I walked in the pretty day, I realized something else. I was walking on the concrete. There was grass over there, but I was following the concrete, even though it was the long way around. At what point did I become conditioned to keep off the grass, and follow the concrete wherever it leads? On the concrete, you have to move out of the way of bikes and cars and strollers. There's very seldom a situation on the grass where you have to do that. So I decided to get off of the concrete.

You probably think I'm making a big deal out of a little short walk through a patch of dead grass in the city- and you'd be right. It really is kind of sad - that that's all it takes to make me feel at one with nature, lol. But it's little, intentionally slow, outdoor, natural things that we were created to know, I think. So it was a great reunion between me and walking and grass. I actually felt closer to God.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning said:

Earth's crammed with heaven,
And every common bush afire with God,
But only those who see take off their shoes.
The rest sit around and pluck blackberries.

Ty said:
"That sounds like a blog, to me."

Turns out they were both right.

RLP

If you haven't visited reallivepreacher.com, then you've been missing out on some truly inspiring stuff. The kind of stuff you want to steal liberally and claim as your own (which I would NEVER do). Just yesterday I came across his post that asks (and answers) the question "What if we could do church any way we wanted?" I thought I'd share it with you, in hopes that you'll put forth your thoughts on it, and also that you'll visit the RLP when you get a chance.

What if we could do church any way we wanted?

First of all, we probably wouldn’t call ourselves a church. That English word is rather tired, I think. It really doesn’t communicate very well, and it’s not a biblical word in any case. We might call ourselves “A Gathering of Friends,” or perhaps, “A Community Living in the Way of Christ.” I don’t know what we would call ourselves; maybe we wouldn’t have a name at all.

I don’t think we would concern ourselves very much with what individuals in the community say about Jesus or even believe about Jesus. It’s not that what we say about Jesus doesn’t matter, but this community would begin with real living. There will be time enough for pretty Jesus words later on.

We would begin with between five and fifteen people who are committed to following in the way of Christ, confessing their weaknesses and turning their lives over to God as they understand him or her. We would make certain commitments to God and to each other:

• We would meet once or twice a week to worship together. This meeting would be a very high priority in our lives.
• We would make these friendships intentional ones and make it a point to spend time together.
• We would agree to pray and study the scriptures together and on our own.
• We would nurture each other and care for one another, especially if one of us was hurting or in need.
• We would simplify our lives to the point where we could give 10% of our income to the community. Some who have been on the journey longer might give more.
• Each of us would find a personal and fulfilling way to serve God by serving the world. Finding your joyful place of service would be a central part of being in this community, for we would agree that Christianity is a way of living more than a set of doctrines.

We would never pay anyone to be a professional Christian. There would be no staff, no paid ministers, no salaries, and no overhead. If there were even ten wage earners among us, our collected offerings might be between twenty and fifty thousand dollars. With no salaries, buildings, or other administrative costs, almost all of this money would be used to do good things in the name of Christ.

Maybe once a year we would sit around a kitchen table and say, “What do you want to do for God this year?”

There would be a little money left over to buy coffee or even a guitar if someone wanted to play it during worship. Maybe twice a year we would all go on an extended retreat together. Those with limited funds would never have to worry about being able to afford that sort of thing.

If there were children among us, they would sit on our laps and worship with us. We would not have children’s classes. We wouldn’t need them. We would teach the children ourselves and let them be a part of everything we do.

We would never purchase or rent a place to worship. Homes would suffice. If and when the gathering became too large to meet comfortably in a living room, we would divide into two groups. Perhaps the two living room churches would meet together once a month at a park or in some borrowed space. We wouldn't worry about what will happen someday. These things will work themselves out. I’m of the opinion that there is far too much planning in churches nowadays.

We would never advertise our faith community. Advertising tends to cheapen things, and I think we wouldn't want to start going down that road. We would bring friends with us as we felt led. I’m sure some would find us in very mysterious ways. We would trust that those who are ready to find us would find us. Anyone would be welcome to meet with us in the living room, of course. Some might join the community when they felt ready to embrace our commitments.

If there is preaching, it would be done by everyone. All who feel ready to share would take their turn. You would have weeks or even months to read your passage of scripture prayerfully. Then you would simply share the wisdom you found in the scriptures with your good friends.

The best news of all is that we would lay down the terrible burden of planning and strategizing for the business of church. Large budgets, buildings, and programs require business plans and outreach strategies. But you see, the big picture would not be our concern. The future would be left in the hands of God. We would content ourselves with our simple lives of service and devotion. What happens beyond that would be God’s business and not ours.

It sounds refreshing, does it not? And vaguely familiar. Even if you’ve never been a part of something like that, your heart knows that it would feel like going home.

There's been a lot of talk around my church lately about George Barna's book Revolution that came out recently. Barna predicts (often with accuracy bordering on creepy) that within the next 25 years, the Church (big "C") will move out of churches (little "c") and into houses and living rooms, as described above. The RLP couldn't be more right in describing how his own idea feels to me. My heart knows that it would feel like going home. But there seems to be some resistance to the idea among some of my colleagues on the church staff. I can't tell if it's because they don't like the idea, because it means the destruction of their current career, or if they genuinely believe it's crap. Frankly - I LOVE the idea, and ironically, I'm really the only one on this staff who doesn't have other options, as far as employment goes. I've got no other real skills (some would say I've no skills at THIS job, but I digress), so if things go the way of George Barna, J.T. and the RLP, then I'd be in trouble, and probably be knocking down the door at the University of Phoenix (they do have a door, right? And it's not just a virtual one?). But material success has never been all that important to me (sorry Casey Adams, lol), and if it serves the Kingdom better, and makes better disciples, how can I oppose it? I might be permanently out of a job - but what a way to go!

My Favorite Comedian:

Pastor John Hagee, of Cornerstone Church in San Antonio, TX.

Seriously - funniest guy I've ever heard. When I flip through the channels, I can't pass him up. I used to watch him in college, and just now I was looking for a football game, and got sucked in.

"Sin fascinates - then it assassinates"
"Sin thrills - and then it kills"
"You don't try Jesus. You try broccoli. You try low-fat ice cream. And it's terrible! It tastes like ground up styrofoam."

Comedy GOLD - i'm tellin' ya.

Oh, and also - God wants to make you rich.

Prince of Themyscira!

HA!

"Are you with me?!!?"

Cowboy Mouth did an hour and a half set outside the P-MAC (Pete Maravich Assembly Center) at 10:00 this morning, before the LSU/Arkansas game. I actually got up early, got dressed, and drove myself down to LSU in time to park and walk to the P-MAC for the show. And I don't know if it was the late night, the early morning, or the fact that I miss home so much, but I left there at 11:30 feeling like I'd been hit by a truck - in a good way. Cowboy Mouth did not disappoint. They brought it. If you haven't seen a CM show, I feel kind of sorry for you. They're not the most technical band in the world, nor the most poetic, but what they certainly are is 100% kick-arse rock and roll. I'm convinced that this country would not be so dependent upon foreign oil if we could somehow harness whatever it is that Fred LeBlanc has got, and gives to the crowd at a CM show. He's got this ability to get even casual fans and introverts up off their feet, and screaming at the top of their lungs. Pure energy. It really is a sight to see. It's actually kind of like church. Actually, it's indescribable. Everybody that's ever been has described it the same way - you can't understand unless you've been there - and it's true. The name Cowboy Mouth is from a play by Sam Shepard, that he co-wrote with Patti Smith, but the phrase first appears in a song by Bob Dylan. Today they played covers of The Who's Won't Get Fooled Again, Bruce Channel's Hey, Baby!, the state song of Louisiana - You Are My Sunshine, and Milkshake by Kelis. Come to think of it, they are kind of a cross between The Who, Governor Jimmie Davis, Tony Robbins, and the Tasmanian Devil. If you ever have a chance to check them out, you should - at least once.

After the show, I hooked up with my aunt and uncle, my cousin, and some of his friends because they had my ticket to the game. We tracked down one of my aunt's business partners, who helped get us the tickets, and they twisted our arm until we promised to tailgate with them. I stood there under the walkway of the P-MAC, and lo and behold, who should walk by but Fred LeBlanc, drummer, lead singer, and motivational screamer of Cowboy Mouth. I told him they had played a great show earlier, and shook his hand. Really nice guy. Then he stopped to tailgate with us for a while. It's difficult to be starstruck around somebody who's so normal, and is big and fat and has a plate full of barbecued chicken fingers and hot sausage in front of them. Oh - and a freakin' Diet Coke. Please, Fred. Please. Eventually, all three other members of the band had come by, and I had fallen completely in love with their new bass player chick. She's hot, dude. And she's in a band. Billy - this is like that time at the thing with the Wonder Woman, you know? Exactly - love at first sight.

Anyway, LSU played - and won, of course. Now we are the SEC West Champions. Next step in our quest for total nationwide league domination: defeat Georgia in the Georgia Dome next weekend. Our Tiger Shaolin is stronger than their Bulldog Shaolin. Flawless victory.

"So the devil will know who sent you."

Happy Thanksgiving, gang!

As usual, the Thomas family (minus Casey, who spent the holiday with Juan and his family at Disney World) slept in, and rolled up in Picadilly at about 1:30 p.m. for the annual Thanksgiving feast. I had Turkey and "dressing", Mom had pork chops in praline sauce (yes, pralines), and Dad had chopped steak. After overindulging ourselves, we played everybody's favorite Picadilly game, and looked on the check to see whose meal cost the most, and whose cost the least. Then, Casey called from Orlando and we went around the table, each announcing what we were thankful for.

There was some difference of opinion regarding this year's Thanksgiving movie. Since none of us is really a Harry Potter aficionado, and since I had seen Jarhead already, it really only came down to one of two movies. Walk The Line, playing everywhere, and The Legend of Zorro, playing at the crappy oldest theater in town without stadium seating. Dad used his veto on Walk The Line for pretty much no reason at all, so Zorro it was!

I must say - even though this movie was almost universally panned by critics, I found it very entertaining. I absolutely LOVE the Zorro character. Sure, nobody buys the whole "if you just put on a mask, nobody will recognize you" bit, and a person could probably fight a lot better, and more efficiently without doing a bunch of flips and somersaults and stuff, but anybody can do that. I wanna see a dude fight, and be acrobatic, and swing on stuff, and crack wise while he's doing it. It's no big secret that Zorro was much of the inspiration for Batman - a hero in black, an urban legend among the people he helps, available at a moments notice when summoned by a previously agreed upon signal, a flawless fighter, and a tragically flawed individual. In the Batman mythos, Bruce Wayne and his family were actually leaving the theater after having seen "The Mark Of Zorro" when his parents were killed. Coincidence? I think not. My awe of the character must be similar to the same awe that Bob Kane must have felt when he created Batman way back in the day. So - the critics hated this flick. So, maybe it's not as good as its predecessor. So what. I don't need Zorro to win Oscars, I need him to best 10 men at once in a sword fight, jump off of something high and land on his feet, outrun a train on his horse, pound the bad guy into oblivion, carve a "Z" into his chest, and say, "So the devil will know who sent you" before tying him to the front of aforementioned speeding locomotive (loaded with nitroglycerine) as it speeds into something solid. Is that too much to ask? I don't think so. This flick delivers. It's a good time. Rent it.

So, on the way out, I'm chatting with mom and dad as we walk along the sidewalk... I turn and walk backwards as I talk to them behind me, and as I turn back around, something stops me dead in my tracks. You know how some people act like they've been rendered speechless because it's funny, or makes a point, or whatever? As far as I can tell - this is what they're pretending to do. I seriously forgot to keep talking and walking when I saw this:




That's right- it's a BATMAN MOTORCYCLE. Is it possible that someone could be more of a fan than me? Is it possible? Or is it just possible that someone who is an equal fan has more money than me. Friends, I think it is the latter. I looked around for the owner of this beauty. Then I asked around for them. When I couldn't find them, I tried to steal it... but I don't have a bike license, nor have I ever actually ridden a motorcycle, so I figured it wouldn't do me any good. I'll just have to paint my car, is all.

Anyway - to cap off an already wonderful day, I got a call from Dustin. She is here in B.R., away from her family for Thanksgiving, so I took her to see Walk The Line, which I was secretly dying to see anyway. That's all the excuse I needed to make it a double feature day. LOVED Walk The Line. Loved it. Go see it. And sing out loud, it's okay. Especially if you're in the same theater as Bill.

How was yours?

iPod Meme

RIPPED! from Jamie's blog... for your reading pleasure - the soon-to-be-famous iPod meme.
Take the top 25 most popular songs on your iPod... type in the first lyric... cross them out as readers guess correctly.

1. I've got another confession to make... I'm your fool.**Jamie**

2. I know it sounds funny but I just can't stand the pain. Girl, I'm leavin' you tomorrow. **Krysten**

3. A man walks down the street - he says, "Why am I soft in the middle, now. Why am I so soft in the middle. The rest of my life is so hard." **Krysten**

4. Boys speak in rhythm, and girls in code (doot do-doot-doo).**Jamie**

5. Am I at the point of no improvement?

6. It's been a long year, since you've been gone.

7. Whenever I'm alone with you, you make me feel like I am home again. **Krysten**

8. I woke up to the sound of pouring rain. Wind would whisper, and I'd think of you. **Krysten**

9. Everybody loves a rose. Will you be thankful for the thorns?**Krysten**

10. I may not always love you, but long as there are stars above you, you never need to doubt it.**Jamie**

11. Now sit right back as I bust a rhyme, I got the freshest beats, and I'm always on time. I'm the baddest of the best, yeah, I'm the king. Word.

12. You're softer than a cannon blast - but your effects much longer last.**Jamie**

13. Well, my daddy left home when I was three, and he didn't leave much for ma and me, 'cept this old guitar, and an empty bottle of booze.**Danael**

14. Living on the road, my friend, is gonna keep you free and clean. Now you wear your skin like iron, your breath as hard as kerosene.**Tanya**

15. Free to turn away - SAY GOODBYE!**Shane**

16. Her name is Noel, I had a dream about her.**Shane**

17. The grass looked greener on the other side, and so I tried - to snatch myself from your hand. **Krysten**

18. I'm in love - never been so sure of anything.**Jamie**

19. I wanna trip inside your head, and spend the day there.

20. In the howling wind... comes the stinging rain.

21. It was a clear, black night - a clear white moon.

22. Shorty get down, good lord, baby got it workin' all over town.

23. They took the whole Cherokee nation - put us on this reservation.**Danael**

24. Just a castaway, an island lost at sea-O... another lonely day, there's noone here but me-O.**Krysten**

25. New boy in the neighborhood, lives downstairs and it's understood - he's there just to take good care of me - like he's one of the family.**Jamie**

Do your worst!

678 Square Feet

The cable guy just left. Now all is right with the world. I've got my superfast internet. I've got my digital cable with way too many channels. I've got the DVR *SIGH*. A guy from the church gave me his son's old PS2 and some games. I rented NCAA 2005, and am right in the middle of a dynasty season in which LSU is 6-0, and ranked number 2 in the nation (so far). I am this close to staying in Houston for the Thanksgiving holiday and just laying in front of the TV. Seriously - I'm trying to imagine something more fun than this.

I can't.

I wondered if I would be miserable in a tiny little apartment all by myself. I thought I might be lonely, or that I wouldn't have enough room. Well, 678 square feet is plenty of room for me. Of the 5 nights I've spent here, I've had company for 3 of them - and there was plenty of room for them, too. Also, there are distinct advantages to living all by myself. I can wear or not wear whatever the heck I want. If somebody eats all of something, I know exACtly who it was. When somebody forgets to flush - same thing. I can stay up as late as I want, and if I fall asleep with the TV on? Nobody cares. Heck, nobody even KNOWS. Somehow, the darn thing always ends up turned off in the morning. And no, it's not a sleep timer - it's the elves, or something. I've got a sweet new coffee table and matching end tables, 3 new lamps, a fake plant for the little nook above my bar, and a cool-looking brand new phone that's not turned on yet.

I just got up to drink a little bit of milk. Straight out of the jug! That's just how I roll. I can do that now. When you come to my house, and want some milk - you better ask first. Just in case. Anyway - when I did, I noticed something. Obviously all milk has an expiration date, and it's not a hard and fast rule, just a guideline blahblahblahblahblah.... whatever. Drinking milk past its expiration date is not a chance I am willing to take. Even if it's just the next day. Heck, even if it's the same day - I'll actually stop to think about it. My milk has an expiration date of November 28. People are always like - "What? You think that on November 27th it's good, but at the stroke of midnight, it sours and curdles immediately?" People think they are sooo funny. No, I do not think that's what happens. I think it's more like 8:21 PM, and here's why -

IT SAYS SO ON MY MILK.

I wouldn't mess with you about something so serious. My milk not only has an expiration date, it has an expiration time. I wish I had a picture. Mock on, you scoffers! What comment have you naysayers on THAT!?

So yeah. I hadn't really planned out this post or anything, so there's no real beginning, middle or end. So...

Donde esta Carmen San Diego

create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.

Let's Get It On

Your Seduction Style: Sweet Talker

Your seduction technique can be summed up with "charm" You know that if you have the chance to talk to someone... Well, you won't be talking for long! ;-) You're great at telling potential lovers what they want to hear. Partially, because you're a great reflective listener and good at complementing. The other part of your formula? Focusing your conversation completely on the other person. Your "sweet talking" ways have taken you far in romance - and in life. You can finess your way through any difficult situation, with a smile on your face. Speeding tickets, job interviews... bring it on! You truly live a *charmed life*

What Kind of Seducer Are You?

Krysten and Jamie - for the love of all things good and holy!! Cease and desist!!

"I must blake you..."

J.T. is a Giant Ant that eats Metal, has Black-and-White Stripes, an Extra Head and a Long Neck, and picks up Cars and Throws Them. Strength: 4 Agility: 4 Intelligence: 10 To see if your Giant Battle Monster can defeat J.T., enter your name and choose an attack: fights J.T. using Strength Agility Intelligence

Blogthings

Your Superhero Profile

Your Superhero Name is The Silver Engineer Your Superpower is Piracy Your Weakness is The Moon Your Weapon is Your Gas Sling Your Mode of Transportation is Kite

What's your Superhero Name?

In a Past Life...

You Were: A Greasy Astrologer. Where You Lived: Saudi Arabia. How You Died: Hung for treason.

Who Were You In a Past Life?

Your 1920's Name is:

Garvin Ardell

What's Your 1920's Name?

You Are 60% Weird

You're so weird, you think you're *totally* normal. Right? But you wig out even the biggest of circus freaks!

How Weird Are You?

H-Town: Day 2 - Houston by the numbers

Woke up: 8:20 a.m.
Arrived at work: 9:05 a.m.
(SEE. He can do it.)
Cost of BBQ Lunch (it is Texas, after all): $9.24
Cost of a new AC power cord for Dell Inspiron 9300: $80.00
(I left the real one on my couch in Baton Rouge.)
Exchange period for new AC power cord: 90 days
(Better believe it's going back.)
# of songs lost from iTunes after computer guy set me up on the network: 2,472
(8.2 days, 9.17 GB)
# of songs recovered from iPod, extracted to external hard drive, and manually dragged and dropped back into iTunes: 2,468
(Don't ask me what the other 4 were, or where they went.)
# of students and/or parents and/or coworkers names I actually remember: 5?
(Are we talking real names?)
Date I was supposed to be able to move into my apartment: November 10, 2005
Date that Lisa, the apartment lady, called and told me I could move in, instead: November 5, 2005
Date that I can realistically move in, financially speaking: November 15, 2005
Left work: 5:15 p.m.
Total work hours today: 8 hours 10 minutes
(But who's counting?)
Gas at Copperfield Exxon #60399: 10.464 gallons at $2.389/gallon = $25.00.
(I swear the pump stopped itself right there. I took it as a good omen. Okay - I took it as inspiration to write this post.)
Dinner at Boston Market: $11.12
(Exact change. A ten, a one, two nickels, two pennies.)
Smallville: 7 p.m. CST on Channel 36
Survivor: 7 p.m. CST on Channel 12
CSI: 8 p.m. CST on Channel 12
# of times the freakin' DirectTV lost signal tonight: 4
Average length of lost signal: 5 minutes
Is it currently on the fritz for good? Yes.
Percentage of Sunday morning's High School Sunday School lesson complete: 0%
Days until Sunday: 3
Days until return to Baton Rouge: 3

This was really fun. We should do it again sometime. OH - AND....

A Boy Named Sue by Johnny Cash (Mitchell Shoumaker)

Shaleauxm.

Ode to B.R. - Upon My "About-to-be-leaving"

I know it sounds funny, but I just can't stand the pain.
Girl I'm leavin' you tomorrow.
Seems to me, girl, you know I've done all I can.
See I begged, stole, and I borrowed.

That's why I'm easy.
Easy like Sunday mornin', yeah.
I'm easy.
Easy like Sunday mornin'.

Why in the world would anybody put chains on me?
I paid my dues to make it.
Everybody wants me to be what they want me to be.
I'm not happy when I try to fake it.

I wanna be high, so high.
I wanna be free to know the things I do are right.
I wanna be free.... just me....

That's why I'm easy.
Easy like Sunday mornin', yeah.
I'm easy.
Easy like Sunday mornin'.

- Easy - The Commodores

Also, if anybody's wondering - this is the song that reminds me of Brett Babin, for some reason.

Soothes the savage breast

So, last night, I saw Elizabethtown with Mitchell and Dustin. Not that they're in it... but they went to see it with me. Anyways - Cameron Crowe never disappoints. Say Anything, Jerry Maguire, Almost Famous, Elizabethtown. The hits just keep on coming. Well, these kids didn't know anything about Cameron Crowe flicks. But anybody want to guess the first thing they remarked about when the movie was over? Of course - the soundtrack. One character in the movie even sends another on a road trip across the country, complete with a down-to-the-minute mixed cd soundtrack. We started talking after the movie about how music makes all the difference, and I even mentioned those cool re-cuts of old movies that keep popping up on the web these days (check these out when you get a chance - they're short).

It's a funny thing that this came up. Because as I drove home from H-Town the other day, I heard a song on the radio, and had a little bit of a moment. It was a song that reminded me of a someone, and a sometime that I missed. For me, that song will always be a link to that time, and especially that person. Some of us really can trace the pattern of our lives through music. I realized that there are some songs that will always remind me of some of you. So as I drove - I started to make a list, first a mental one, and then a written one, that I've decided to include here. This might be construed as pandering - whoring for comments. I don't care. I think I've proven time and time again that I have no problem with that. What I want to know is this: do you agree? Do you even remember the significance of this song, and what the heck it has to do with you? Do you have a better idea for "our song"? If you haven't made the list yet- give it time... this is an ongoing project, or submit your suggestion. So here goes... in no particular order:

I Love The Way You Love Me by John Michael Montgomery (Gayden Jones)
Celebration by Die Happy (April Melancon)
Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton (Andrea Naul)
Goodbye by Hootie and the Blowfish (Ginny Ebarb)
Freshmen by Verve Pipe (Christie White)
Long December by Counting Crows (Abby Conner)
Fields Of Gold by Sting (Casey Adams)
Can't Fight This Feeling by REO Speedwagon (Jennifer Garner)(Yes, I dated a chick named Jennifer Garner.)
Goin' Down by the Monkees (Erin Johnson)
Theodicy On Trial by Tourniquet (Tara Mullin)
God Only Knows by The Beach Boys (Jamie Hawkins)
Arms Of A Woman by Amos Lee (Shelly Munkberg)
Follow Me by Unkle Kracker (Stormy Allen)
Tiny Dancer by Elton John (Emily Babin)
Angel by Sarah McLachlan (Jessica Thacker)
Sweet Surrender by Sarah McLachlan (Robin Watson)
Foreign Language by Anberlin (Dustin Collette)
Arms Of Orion by Prince (Krysten Forde)

Rape Me by Nirvana/ Here I Sit In Prison by Cowboy Mouth (Chris Ables)(Whoa. Creepy.)
Satellite by Dave Matthews Band (Rozino Smith)
Mama Said Knock You Out by L.L. Cool J (Darren Jobe)
Blame It On The Rain by Milli Vanilli (Brannon White)
Every Rose Has Its Thorn by Poison (Mark Johnson)
Paradigm by All Together Seperate (Mitchell Shoumaker)
Farewell To Human Cries by Seventh Angel (Jeff Francis)
Hands In The Air by the Waiting (Shane Mullin)
Groovy Kind Of Love by Phil Collins (Danael Broussard)
The Beautiful People by Marilyn Manson (Bill Chandler)
Ark Of Suffering by Tourniquet (Patrick Mehaffey)
Home Sweet Heaven by Angelica (Sean Borders)
Best I Ever Had by Vertical Horizon (Nathan Dewberry)
Bullet The Blue Sky by U2 (Josh Cohagen)
Lodi by Credence Clearwater Revival,
She's Every Woman by Garth Brooks, and
House Of The Rising Sun by The Animals (Bill, Chris, and Jessica @ the Hungri Maverick)

This is fun! To be updated periodically....

THEY'RE BACK SUCKAS!

Believe it! The Duke boys are reunited on next week's episode of Smallville. Thursday night at 7 p.m. CST on the dubba-dubba-dubba-dubba-dubya-bee (WB).

I seriously hope that THIS guy...

... does not try to make an appearance at Tiger Stadium tomorrow night for the LSU/North Texas game. That's ALL we need. As if the new coach doesn't have enough problems playing out from under his shadow, and getting booed by his own fans - there are plenty of folks who are still willing to unleash boos on this dude for leaving in the first place. It's a lose-lose situation. Stay away, Nick. Stay far, far away until Sunday.

Lord, who sinned.....

Robert Terrell has U2 tickets for the show in Houston this Friday night. Not only that - he has passes for INSIDE THE CIRCLE. Not only that - he has passes to get in during the setup.

Robert and I used to be friends. Before now.

Remember that time when Jesus and the disciples encountered the man who had been blind from birth, and the disciples asked him who had sinned, the man or his parents, to have him born that way?

After reading his post, I found myself asking a similar question.

"Lord, who sinned? Me, or my parents, that Robert gets my U2 tickets and passes?"

and,

"Lord, what good has Robert ever done that he gets those tickets instead of me?"

Then God was like, "Don't you read his blog, yo?" And he started to go on and on and on about stuff Robert had done, and I finally just had to quit listening, and start praying for him to get really, really violently sick.

ACHTUNG!

THIS WAY UP �

Boy Wonder has fragile contents which may break!

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From Go-Quiz.com


Nicely packed, Bagboy!

Baby mama drama

Okay, so I know I've used this picture before, but I thought that it was more appropriate for this post than it's ever been. LISTEN TO THIS:

A couple of weeks ago, my sister and I signed up for the Cox cable bundle pack that includes cable, high speed internet, and telephone service. When we finally got it up and running, it was the first time this house had had a telephone since before I lived here. Naturally we were assigned a phone number for our place. Now, since I never wanted to get a phone in the first place (I have done just fine using just my cell phone for the past 4 years - plus I HATE talking on the phone) - I didn't care much about giving out the new number, so I didn't. But my sister gave it to our parents, her boyfriend, and the church, because she got tired of everybody using up all her cell phone minutes, or using them for business. All that to say - we have a phone, but hardly anybody has the number.

A shortly after getting the phone, we hooked up my old answering machine from college. No sooner had we done so, than I started to get messages from Faye. The ONLY person who has ever left a message on our machine, to this day, is Faye. Faye would call and say she really needed to talk to me, and that it was really, really important. Later she would say that she was getting married in December, and needed to talk to me as soon as possible. But she would always call when I wasn't here. She would promise to call back later on, or the next day at 9 p.m., and I would always plan to be home (my curiosity being peaked), but she never called back when she said she would.

The thing is - I have NO IDEA who Faye is. I've never even met anybody named Faye. And I have no idea how she got my number. What could she want? I formulated this theory that she had called the church to see about getting married there, but that they had told her no, because we only allow church members. Persistent and desperate as she was, I theorized that she had looked on our website, grabbed my name as somebody sympathetic-looking, and perhaps similar in age, called back pretending to know me, and perhaps they gave her my number. I thought she wanted to plea for help in landing our church as the location for her wedding.

I could not have been more wrong.

Last night, with my sister out of town for a week, and noone to witness it - I got one last message on my answering machine from Faye. She said that she had been trying to get in touch with me, but didn't understand why I wouldn't talk to her. She didn't want to leave her phone number, but wanted to let me know that we have a 9 month-old daughter together, and thought I would want to know, and maybe meet her. She emphasized that she didn't want us to get back together, or anything, and that she was getting married in December. She promised to try calling again later on, but after that - and I quote - "forget you!" Much to my dismay - she never did call.

WHAT. THE. HECK.

Just to clarify - Billie Jean is not my lover. She's just a girl who says that I am the one. But the kid is not my son. Seriously, though - I have never met Faye, and I certainly don't have a daughter or son of any age with anybody. But now.... see... now I'm invested in this relationship. I feel bad for Faye because she obviously thinks she has the right man, and he has been ignoring her, for whatever reason. I feel bad for "Jason", whoever he is, because evidently he still doesn't know about his daughter. And I feel bad for me, because really - what's the next step? If she doesn't get closure on this thing before her wedding, is she going to call information with my phone number, and get an address? Maybe show up at my door with my "daughter" and get the shock of both of our lives? Okay, actually - I don't feel sorry for me. Because if that happened I would laugh so amazingly, unbelievably, ridiculously hard for so very very long. You know... after... she left... of course. Now I'm actually sort of wishing that would happen. Because that would make the greatest story ever - and a great follow up blog to this post.

So Faye - wherever you are - don't let it get you down. You've apparently got a great man now, who loves you and my daughter, and is going to make an honest girl out of you in just a few short weeks. You've got so much more to worry about than getting closure with your baby' daddy. Flowers to arrange, tuxes to rent, shoes to dye. Don't miss out on your opportunity to be the very best Bridezilla you can be, just because some man stuck you with a bun in the oven 18 months ago. Cheers!

Voltron, Defender of the Universe

ASSEMBLING VOLTRON
Matt Himes and Richard Ho
Wizard Magazine #169
November 2005

After conquering the imaginations of an entire generation, the Voltron Force heads for some uncharted territory: Hollywood.
Originally launched in 1984, "Voltron: Defender of the Universe" is currently being developed as a big-budget, live-action film by New Line Cinema's Ford Oelman and Mark Costa. The duo snapped up the rights for the cult-favorite animated series from World Events and pitched the concept to producer Mark Gordon (Saving Private Ryan) and musician/producer Pharrell Williams, who will compose the score and produce the soundtrack.
For Oelman and Costa, the journey from TV to silver screen will truly be a labor of love. "We've always been part of the animation generation," said Oelman. "We grew up on shows like Transformers, Thundercats and G.I. Joe, and there's a strong sense of nostalgia for these shows as we get older. As fans, we wondered why there wasn't a Voltron film in development - so we decided to do something about it."
The original series followed the spacefaring adventures of five pilots who journey to the planet Arus to command the robotic lions that make up the fighting machine known as Voltron- all in an effort to save the universe from the dreaded Drule Empire.

...

The producers also plan to do Voltron justice when it comes to the visual effects, which Oelman confirms will be a combination of CGI and physical techniques. "We anticipate using some CGI for the science-fiction elements, but for the most part we want to bring a larger-than-life, realistic Voltron to the big screen", said Oelman. "It's important to utilize every possible technology when making a movie of this scope to ensure the creation of a believable world. For larger mecha battles it can be a good idea to use scale models. I think WETA [Workshop] was amazingly successful The Lord of the Rings, using CGI and scaling techniques as well as intricate makeup and costumes."
The popularity of the various animated series has already proven that Voltron has staying power - and the producers hope that longevity will carry over into the world of movies. "The fact that it's still airing in some territories 21 years after its conception is a testament to its durability," said Oelman. "The film franchise should have the same kind of resonance. We intend to make the first film a success so that we get to do it again and again."


OH. FREAKING. YES. You better believe I am all over this action. Now that Batman Begins is behind us, and The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe is almost upon us, I was badly in need of something I could obsess about. Thank you, crazy-weird Japanese dudes, for creating Voltron. Thank you.

Golden Age J.T.

Earlier today, when I was in the shower, I was thinking of all the things that will be different about living in Houston. One of the biggest drawbacks will be the water. Over here we have what you would call "soft" water. You know, the kind where after you shower, you're not always sure you were able to wash all the soap off? Well, over in H-town, they have what you call "hard" water. The kind where it's difficult to get a smooth shave, and your skin is never slick, but actually kind of rubbery.

Then I got to thinking - the Golden Age Flash, Jay Garrick, was the first speedster in all of comics. And do you know how he got his speed? As a college student he was investigating the properties of so-called experimental "hard" water, and prolonged exposure to it caused him to develop super-speed. Yeah, I know - doesn't connect quite as well as getting bitten by a radioactive spider, or having your parents killed right before your eyes - but that's the story. Anyways, here's hoping that after years of being used the the "soft" water, prolonged exposure to the "hard" stuff will endow me with powers I never could have imagined. Like the ability to run at several times the speed of sound. Then I could come visit you all on my lunch break, and be back at work in plenty of time. *Fingers crossed!*

Leadership Bartlet Style

Yeah, yeah, so I know this is the second West Wing post already on the new blog, so blah, blah, blah bite me. But as I mentioned in the earlier post (the most wildly successful post comment-wise, of my young blogging career, I might add), since the acquisition of my DVR, I have more West Wing episodes to watch than time to watch them. It doesn't help that this past week, Bravo! featured a marathon of seasons 5 and 6.

So - this afternoon, as I lay on the couch in my pj's (Yes, I said this afternoon, and NO, I did not even see the morning, and you can judge me if you want but I work on Sundays). Where was I? Oh yes...

This afternoon, as I lay on the couch in my pj's, watching Leo's heart attack and Claudia Jean's assumption of the Chief of Staff position - I was reminded of a thought I had a few weeks back when I was in the thick of West Wing watching... before LOST, Smallville, and new West Wing episodes which (did I mention?) have taken a turn for the lame. I had this idea that someone should write a book on leadership, using examples from the West Wing. I mean, somebody wrote this book, this book, and this book. They could call it Leadership Bartlet Style (Jamie - you may eat your candy now). I am enthralled by watching not only the decisions those characters make, but the process they go through in order to make them.

The silliest thing you'll ever hear me admit to on this blog is that I've started to think of our office as a mini-West Wing. Maybe, just maybe (mention this to anybody else and I'll deny it), myself as a Josh Lyman. As stupid as it sounds, it motivates and inspires me, even excites me - to think of our place like that. Now, my boss is hardly anything like Jed Bartlet (Glenallen Walken, perhaps?) but you should have seen us during the Hurricane relief efforts. Stand-up meetings to coordinate, specific tasks to specific people to benefit the greater cause, verbose, lofty, hilarious conversations while walking down the hall at breakneck speed. Okay, maybe not that last one. And don't think this type of thinking wasn't a factor when I considered accepting my new position at Copperfield - they've already got this vibe going on.

And you might get the impression that I think I'm going to write this book - but I'm under no such illusions. Maybe I'll do some research. If by "research" you mean watching countless episodes of my favorite show and writing down cool stuff. Maybe I can get credit on the book jacket that way - but I have the perfect person picked out to write this book.

Shane Mullin.
Dude, I'm about to make your career.

Shane is a bigger WW fan than anybody I know. He has the charisma, and thinks big enough to actually write a book and expect it to sell. He studied business at ETBU - AND is currently enrolled in classes toward a Master of Science degree in...

wait for it....

ORGANIZATIONAL LEADERSHIP AND ETHICS.

Are you kidding me? It's like asking me to write a book about Batman, and laundry-piling. It's buttah! Tell me you wouldn't buy this book?

Irony of ironies, just today that kid blogged over on his site that:
"I need to rework my Personal Concept of Leadership and I need to write my Leadership Development Plan. Both of these documents are going to serve me well for a long, long while"

You can all thank me later. Possibly with a back-end deal on the book profits. I'm claiming proprietary rights on this. Steal it, and I'll sue you. In love, of course.

Ain't she a beauty?

Big day for me yesterday. I paid off the car. That's right - I am now the proud owner of a tan 1999 Ford Escort Sedan, in mediocre condition. More importantly, I am now the sole owner of something that cost (not something that is worth, mind you) $12,000.00. This means 1 of 2 things. Either I will 1) bask in the luxury of having an extra $200 to spend every month - or 2) take advantage of my imminent pay increase to saddle myself with the even greater burden of buying something new. Place your bets now on which one that will be.

Also, yesterday I told the students in the youth group that I would be leaving at the end of the month. I was semi-nervous, but not as nervous as when I had to tell the preacher. I made a joke thatI have my work cut out for me, because there are lots of successful churches with successful youth ministries in the country, and that somebody has got to be there to run them into the ground, like I did this one. The kids took it well, with no small amount of tears from the girls, but eventually, smiles all around. All of a sudden, everyone seems to have a sense of the value that every day now holds. Funny what it takes to give us a sense of urgency like this. Note to self: remember this feeling in your new job, and in all your relationships from now on.

All in all, it wasn't a bad time. I knew that no matter how the day went, at then end of it there was a big steaming pile of LOST waiting for me on my DVR when I got home. *Sigh* Thank God for LOST. It's a rock for me. Anybody notice Walt's picture on the milk carton during Hurley's dream sequence at the beginning? Attention to detail, and little gifts like that are what make this the best show on TV. Well, now that the West Wing has taken a turn for the LAME.

Today I'm cleaning up my office. Not out - up. Getting it ready to be cleaned out. It's complicated, I know. Something tells me an ounce of prevention of this mess, would be worth a pound of cure for it.

Something tells me that I'd blog more often if I could keep every post to about this length.

**edited to add: Looking for tickets to Saturday's LSU game vs. Florida. Any ideas?

"Leaving home ain't easy.... but may be the only way" - Queen

Finally. I've been holding off posting, until I had something official to say, and now I guess I can let the cat out of the bag.

I'm moving to Houston. It's official. I submitted my resignation to my pastor today, and let him know I'd only be staying through the end of October. This Wednesday I will face the daunting task of having to tell the group of students I've grown to love that I won't be their youth minister anymore. This weekend, I'll tell the church, and next week, they'll publish my letter of resignation in the church newsletter. I'm not sure how people will react. Some will probably be angry. Some will be disappointed. Some will be relieved. I must admit I've never really had close friends at the church aside from some teenagers, and kids who are now in the college group. I wonder if they will decide to go ahead and pretend I've already left. This could be a very lonely three weeks. While I'm excited about the future, everything I do at Jefferson for the next 3 weeks will have a sort of bitter taste to it - all the "lasts".

However, I am hopeful, and optimistic about starting something new. I am throwing in my lot with a church in Houston where my aunt, uncle and cousin go. Copperfield Church is much larger than any church I've been involved with before, and comes about as close as I can imagine to what I would call an "ideal situation". After several visits, to interview, to teach Sunday School, to attend a couple of student events to meet kids, and to get interrogated by parents, the church voted on me yesterday morning. Rumor has it, the results were 189 to 5 in my favor. Those five people have been summarily executed. Seriously though, I am going to be the Sr. High School Minister, on a team with several other top-notch folks, including a Jr. High Minister. Both the Sr. High and Jr. High youth groups have about 150 kids each, so this will be no small task. The magnitude of this responsibility - especially in comparison to my present responsibility - is not lost on me.

The next couple of weeks will involve getting the house in order at Jefferson, packing, and finding an apartment in H-town. I think the part I'm least looking forward to is cleaning out my office. Ugh. Maybe I could just take what's mine and skip town with piles of paper and mail on my desk and a five gallon bucket of plastic flamingos in the middle of the floor. But probably not. Do any of you know anybody in Houston? I don't know a lot of folks, but let me tell you this - I'm getting just enough of a pay increase to spring for a 2 bedroom apartment, and if you can read this I expect you to fill half of it at some point. No, really. I need your company.

Alot of posts in the near future might trend toward the cathartic - me quoting Donald Miller, whining about leaving, starting over, moving on, family, friends are friends forever kind of crap. Just play along. I'm sure I'll be letting you know which LOST character I am, which Napoleon Dynamite character I am, what my emo name is, and which High School stereotype fits me.

Your thoughts?

Red State, Blue State

You are a Social Moderate (55% permissive) and an... Economic Moderate (50% permissive) You are best described as a: Centrist Link: The Politics Test on OkCupid Free Online Dating

Thanks Robert Terrell.

America's Teams

By Dan Wetzel, Yahoo! Sports
September 11, 2005

One team, displaced to the road like nearly everyone else back home, faced a championship contender on their turf and scored four times in the fourth quarter, including twice on special teams and once when, on fourth-and-forget-it, a 39-yard prayer was caught for a touchdown to deliver the comeback, the game and the dream.

One team, displaced to the road like nearly everyone else back home, faced a championship contender on their turf and scored twice in the fourth quarter, including a last-second, 47-yard game-winning field goal to deliver the comeback, the game and the dream.

And so now you begin to wonder.

Louisiana State on Saturday night, New Orleans Saints on Sunday afternoon. Two stunning, last-moment victories.

Do you believe in miracles?

"In the back of our minds, we know we have to give them one tiny bit of hope," quarterback Aaron Brooks told reporters after the Saints' 23-20 victory over Carolina, which came not 24 hours after LSU beat Arizona State 35-31.

"We have complete faith in what we are doing because every time we go out there, it is our job to give them hope that every day will be a better day."

And there can be no minimizing the word "tiny" here. A couple of dramatic football victories don't bring back the dead, lower the floodwaters or rebuild neighborhoods.

A couple of dramatic football victories are a couple of dramatic football victories – a little more than nothing in the great, grand post-Katrina scheme of things.

But if you witnessed New York and its Yankees after September 11, if you can appreciate that having anything to cheer, to distract or to warm the heart can mean so much more than tiny, then these were more than just a couple of dramatic football victories.

If you can understand that for some of the 340,000 former residents of Greater New Orleans, huddled across the country in shelters, hotels and someone else's living room, the chance to pump a fist about something great happening to a couple of teams representing their battered hometown and bruised home state is more than just a couple of dramatic football victories.

Which is why everyone's favorite team to reach the Super Bowl should be the New Orleans Saints.

And everyone's favorite team to reach the Rose Bowl ought to be the LSU Tigers.

Because who doesn't want to believe in miracles?

Before the Saints' game at Super Bowl-favorite Carolina, coach Jim Haslett read a letter he received from New Orleans Mayor C. Ray Nagin, who understands all of this too well.

"He talked about the things he had seen, babies dying," receiver Joe Horn told reporters.

Horror movie stuff Horn went on to say. Every-day stuff in the Big Easy. It brought the tragedy of New Orleans home for a group of players and coaches who have the spent the last two weeks in San Antonio.

For the LSU players, a letter from the front lines wasn't needed. Their game against Arizona State was moved to Tempe because their campus is full of refugees from New Orleans. Sixty-eight Tigers hail from Louisiana, 14 from the city of New Orleans.

This is their tragedy.

"I'm just so proud," LSU coach Les Miles said afterward.

Everyone should be. These two teams won two games under incredible distraction and distress. And both teams spent their postgame interviews talking about how they have it easy, reminding us that football is nothing and repeating that they would trade all the wins in the world for Katrina to never have happened.

"It's not all about us anymore," Saints offensive lineman Wayne Gandy said.

Humble, big-picture athletes? In today's sports world?

The fortunes of these teams could have broken either way. The hurricane could have cost focus, it could have slowed minds, it could have sucked the fight out of people too tired to fight for something so frivolous.

Or it could raise them up – give them a sense of pride and purpose never before experienced. Having something so powerful and real to rally around – not just silly locker room stuff – could give two teams the little edge that creates big seasons.

It was just football. It was just one weekend.

But for two teams with one dream, it was much more than that

"No, but could you tell me more about Jackie Robinson, and breaking barriers?"

So - I got this fascinating new device from my cable company for mere pennies per month. It's a DVR. If you don't know what that is, look it up - you need to know. It's like TiVo, or replaytv. It enables me to record, without those cumbersome videotapes, anything I want. In fact, I can even set it to record a certain show any time it comes on on any channel. Which I have done with several shows, including (here comes the point) The West Wing. Since I got it I have watched approximately 453 episodes. In case you didn't know - The West Wing is probably (not possibly) the 100% greatest television show of all time.

It is also the show with the coolest dialogue. Since about 79.8% of the appeal of something is sharing it with others, I thought I would contribute to our conversation (yes, we are having a conversation. Deal with it.) several of my favorite bits of West Wing dialogue, and allow you to do the same with your comments - all culminating in a massive compendium of screenwritten literary gems and fanboy geekiness. I'll go first!

President Bartlet: I could jump you right now.
Abby Bartlet: I could kill you right now.
President Bartlet: My thing's more fun.
-----

Josh Lyman: All I'm saying is, if you were in an accident, I wouldn't stop to get a beer.
Donna Moss: If you were in an accident, I wouldn't stop for red lights.
-----

President Bartlet: Who's your commander-in-chief?
Abby Bartlet: You are.
-----

(With the cabinet member who stays behind during the State of the Union address, in case someone blows up the Capitol Building)
President Bartlet: Roger, if anything happens, you know what to do, right?
Roger: I honestly hadn't thought about it, sir.
President Bartlet: First thing always is national security. Get your commanders together. Appoint Joint Chiefs, appoint a chairman. Take us to Defcon 4. Have the governors send emergency delegates to Washington. The assistant Attorney General is going to be the Acting A.G. You got a best friend?
Roger: Yes sir.
President Bartlet: Is he smarter than you?
Roger: Yes sir.
President Bartlet: Would you trust him with your life?
Roger: Yes sir.
President Bartlet: That's your Chief of Staff.
-----

C.J. Cregg: The theme of the Egg Hunt is "Learning is delightful and delicious!" As, by the way, am I.
-----

President Bartlet: "We hold these truths to be self-evident," they said, "that all men are created equal." Strange as it may seem, that was the first time in history that anyone had ever bothered to write that down. Decisions are made by those that show up.
-----

Abby Bartlet: I was very young when I had my kids. I was very, very, very, very young. I was barely even born yet when I had my oldest daughter, Elizabeth.
-----

President Bartlet: You're Dr. Jenna Jacobs, right?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: Yes sir.
President Bartlet: Forgive me, Dr. Jacobs. Are you an M.D?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: A PhD.
President Bartlet: A PhD?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: Yes sir.
President Bartlet: Psychology?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: No sir.
President Bartlet: Theology?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: No sir.
President Bartlet: Social work?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: I have a PhD in English Literature.
President Bartlet: I'm asking 'cause on your show, people call in for advice, and you go by the name Dr. Jacobs on your show, and I didn't know if maybe your listeners were confused by that and assumed you had advanced training in psychology, theology, or health care.
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: I don't believe they are confused, no sir.
President Bartlet: Good. I like your show. I like how you call homosexuality an abomination.
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: I don't say homosexuality is an abomination, Mr. President. The Bible does.
President Bartlet: Yes, it does. Leviticus.
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: 18:22
President Bartlet: Chapter and verse. I wanted to ask you a couple of questions while I have you here. I'm interested in selling my youngest daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. She's a Georgetown sophomore, speaks fluent Italian, always cleared the table when it was her turn. What would a good price for her be? While you're thinking about that, can I ask another? My Chief of Staff, Leo McGarry, insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly says he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or is it okay to call the police? Here's one that's really important because we've got a lot of sports fans in this town: Touching the skin of a dead pig makes one unclean. Leviticus 11:7. If they promise to wear gloves, can the Washington Redskins still play football? Can Notre Dame? Can West Point? Does the whole town really have to be together to stone my brother John for planting different crops side-by-side? Can I burn my mother in a small family gathering for wearing garments made from two different threads? Think about those questions, would you? One last thing: While you may be mistaking this for your monthly meeting of the Ignorant Tight-Ass Club, in this building, when the President stands - nobody sits.
-----

C.J. Cregg: The more photo-friendly of the two turkeys gets a presidential pardon, and a full life at a children's petting zoo; the other one gets eaten.
President Bartlet: If the Oscars were like that, I'd watch.
-----

John Van Dyke: When our children can go to any street corner in America and buy pornography for five dollars, don't you think that is too high a price to pay for free speech?
President Bartlet: No. On the other hand, I do think that five dollars is too high a price to pay for pornography.
-----

And last, but not least:

Toby Ziegler: He calls you and me the Batman and Robin of speechwriting.
Sam Seaborn: Well, I don't think he does.
Toby Ziegler: He doesn't, but he should, 'cause that's what we are.
Sam Seaborn: Okay.
Toby Ziegler: We are Batman and Robin.
Sam Seaborn: Which one's which?
Toby Ziegler: Look at me, Sam. Am I Robin?
Sam Seaborn: I'm not Robin.
Toby Ziegler: Yes you are.
Sam Seaborn: Okay, well, let's move off this.
Toby Ziegler: You bet, little friend.
Sam Seaborn: Listen, we're really not Batman and Robin.
Toby Ziegler: No, we'll keep those identities secret. I'm Bruce Wayne, and you're my ward... Dick Something...
-----

I could go on forever.... and it appears I have.

Petra Means Rock

Rules of the Day:

Rule #1 - When aliens talk, they never use contractions.
Rule #2 - Old people always have exact change.
Rule #3 - Do not trust a man who calls the bathroom "the little boys" room.

About 14 years ago, when I was a high-school freshman, I was walking out of a youth group meeting one Wednesday night and into the parking lot where my mother's van waited. A car - an old beater of a car, too - sped right up to me, and stopped. It was my youth minister's brother-in-law. He said nothing, only rolled down his window, and handed me two cassette tapes.

"What the heck is this?" I asked.

He just smiled, rolled up his window, and drove away.

In the movie version of my life, that moment will feature a bright light shining down and angels singing.

The contents of those cassettes changed my little 14-year-old life forever.
One of those tapes had Deliverance's self titled album on one side and Deliverance - Weapons of our Warfare on the other. THAT is a whole other post altogether. The other tape had Whiteheart - Powerhouse on one side, and on the other side? Petra- Beyond Belief.

That day I was thrust into a world unlike any other I had ever known. Until that time, the soundtrack of my life had been The Beach Boys and The Monkees, and more recently Sir Mix-A-Lot and Public Enemy. I was not prepared for it - but switch had been thrown in me, and from that day forward I would be a worshiper at the church of the rock. (Dramatic enough for ya?)

Petra.

There's no telling how many actual members that band has had over the years. In fact, based on the above "Then" and "Now" pictures, only one man has actually been involved for 33 years - Bob "Eddie Who?" Hartman. Which begs the question - what percentage of actual "Petra" is necessary to continue Petra? 1 out of 5? 20%? Any at all? Or perhaps - obscure Princess Bride reference coming - perhaps, like the Dread Pirate Roberts, it's the name that's the important thing for inspiring the necessary fear/respect. I do find it amazing that a band could survive something so drastic as a lead-singer change, and STILL be as good, if not better, than it was before. When that happens with most bands, people end up choosing one, to the detriment of the band's other stuff. Admit it - you either like Van Halen with Dave, or with Sammy, but not both (and certainly not Gary Cherone). You either like Judas Priest with Rob Halford or with Ripper Owens. The one notable exception is AC/DC - nobody has to choose between Bon Scott and Brian Johnson because they sound almost exactly the same. It's not like that with Petra, either. Don't get me wrong - fans will be debating Grex X. Volz vs. John Schlitt forever - but it's a little bit like arguing about who was the best Bond. It's a win-win. And no - I'm not saying which one is Connery.

Now comes word of Petra's farewell. After 33 years, and very nearly as many members, they are retiring. There have been rumors of a kind of Best Of Petra Concert, with all the former members showing up to play the all the best songs from the albums that they were on. They should literally put a revolving door on the stage. I can't tell you how cool I think that would be - I would pay any amount of money to see it. But I only say that because I know it will never happen. I did have the privilege of seeing them in concert once, though. ETBU brought them in to play for my Freshman class - the last cool thing ETBU actually did.

Anyway - say what you want about Petra, their current place in music, their relevance, and the choices they've made in the past few years, but there's no doubt that they started something, and were the best at it for a long time. I know I sound like everybody's grandfather now, but they just don't write songs like those anymore. For me, Petra will never go out of style, because every time I listen I'll remember what it meant to me growing up. I think it's safe to say that - for better or worse - without them, I wouldn't have ended up the guy I am now. Funny the things we allow to shape us, isn't it? Some people would be ashamed, but not me. Thanks for the memories, Petra - lol.

R.I.P. Petra 1972-2005

"When it came to kissing, Harlow was the best."

Jimmy Stewart You scored 19% Tough, 19% Roguish, 33% Friendly, and 28% Charming!

You are the fun and friendly boy next door, the classic nice guy who still manages to get the girl most of the time. You're every nice girl's dreamboat, open and kind, nutty and charming, even a little mischievous at times, but always a real stand up guy. You're dependable and forthright, and women are drawn to your reliability, even as they're dazzled by your sense of adventure and fun. You try to be tough when you need to be, and will gladly stand up for any damsel in distress, but you'd rather catch a girl with a little bit of flair. Your leading ladies include Jean Arthur and Donna Reed, those sweet girl-next-door types. Find out what kind of classic dame you'd make by taking the Classic Dames Test.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 27% on Tough You scored higher than 53% on Roguish You scored higher than 57% on Friendly You scored higher than 46% on Charming

Link: The Classic Leading Man Test written by gidgetgoes on Ok Cupid

I Want This:

Velvet Elvis: Repainting the Christian Faith
by Rob Bell

And no - in case you're wondering - this is not the new post I promised you yesterday. But sometimes, covetousness compels us to interrupt whatever we are doing and demand certain material posessions. Stop judging me, and just run out and buy it. But you better hurry... if I get a free minute today, I'm Barnes & Noble bound.

**UPDATE** 3:06 p.m.
Got it! I also got a 2006 Batman Calendar, and a copy of Esquire Magazine's THE RULES for men to live by. And I'll probably be including some of those in future posts, because they either make a lot of sense, or are just plain ridiculous.

Saving The World One Ice Chest At A Time...

Well, well, well... - here I am.
Do I have to talk about that bloody storm? I mean, you all watch the news, and read everybody else's blogs. You don't need me to re-hash it, or tell the J.T. version of the story, do you? Even I wouldn't read that. Okay, fine.

For those of you scoring at home, I believe its:

Katrina - 1
New Orleans - 0

And if you don't believe me, just ask any real estate agent in the greater Baton Rouge area. You can NOT buy property here right now. Not because it's in bad shape, or because it costs too much, but because there isn't any. Seriously, our population has doubled in the past week, and apparently the Red Cross is not only handing out blankets, water, and hot meals, but they're also giving away big piles of cash to anybody who wants to buy a new house just up the road in Baton Rouge. My dad was talking about some guy he was working with out at Exxon, who had been trying to sell his house. He had been having some trouble unloading it on somebody, until along comes Katrina, and some refugees from New Orleans show up at his doorstep. They offer him 500G's in cash (more than 2ce what he was asking) if he'll just get his family's personal items, and get out of there. Leave the appliances, leave the furniture, leave the food in the pantry and the refrigerator. Faster than you can say "fat wallet", that dude and his family are on their way out of town, and do you know where they are going to live now?

Any-where they want.

Okay, seriously, I would rather sandpaper a bobcat's butt in a phone booth than recount the lame details of what I've been up to the last few days - so here, for your reading pleasure, are a few key words that you may hear about over the course of the next few years, as we remember this time in our nation's history: Parking lot security, burned noggin, "buy me 3 ice-chests and some snacks", 2 1/2 foot Batman, one bag per person, chainsaw crew, water brigade, airport shifts, Jesse Jackson, Steve Harvey and the Nation of Islam, Sean Penn's leftovers, stealing from Ted Turner, casual Sunday, Oprah's plane, and on-the-air with Richard Condon.

Also, as you may have guessed from the picture - the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary, to which I am currently in bondage, suffered quite a bit of high water. A few days ago I was elated to hear that classes on that campus will, in fact, resume..... in August 2006. HA! I told that joke to everybody I knew for about 6 hours, until I actually looked on the NOBTS website. They expect everybody who's already enrolled in classes to resume their fall schedule October 3rd - on the internet! Are you kidding me? My sister's taking a class called Totall Wellness and the Minister - it's like a Seminary P.E. class. How the heck is she supposed to take that on the internet? Maybe I'm just bitter because I thought I was going to get a pass on this semester - and now most of my assignments will have to be writing assignments submitted electronically, without the benefit of lecture. This Seminary thing just continues to get worse and worse.

Well, I do actually have some thoughts on the sociopolitical situation (no, seriously) down here, but I will save them for a separate post. That way you can be assured that I will post again, and we will all have something to look forward to. Until then, let's keep the "where have you been"'s and "It's about time"'s to a minimum, shall we? Much lub, homies.