You are *bleep* the father!

On no other show is the targeted advertising so blatant (or more confusing) than the Maury show.

It's kind of hilarious, and a little heartbreaking, actually.

Apparently, they assume that the people who watch Maury are the same kind of people who are ON Maury.

They need education - ANY education - fast, in the fields of court reporting, nursing/medical assistance, air conditioning repair, and criminal justice.

They also need lawyers - BAD. They need lawyers for their Social Security benefits, their outstanding IRS liability, and their injuries in motor vehicle accidents.

Lastly - they are diabetics. REALLY OLD ones.

They are age 65-and-over unemployed high-school dropouts who owe the IRS money (for taxes on income they didn't make), who have recently been hurt in an accident, and can't afford their diabetic testing supplies.

NAILED IT!

Also - and if you can believe it, this is actually more ridiculous than the other thing -

I'm pretty sure the producers of the Maury show actually ADD bleeps where none are necessary, in order to make the show seem more scandalous.

For the life of me, I cannot figure out what the *bleep* is being censored on that show most of the time.

Two thumbs "meh"

So, yeah - just got back from seeing District 9.

When I first saw the trailer a while back I was like, "Meh"...

And then when it came out all the reviews were like, "Whoaa, sweet!"

And then everybody I knew saw it and they were all, "Duuuude!"

So I've been dying to go.

And then tonight on my way to pick up Abz for the movie, I talked to my Dad, and he was like, "Worst. Movie. Ever."

Which really surprised me, so I was really intrigued.

I didn't know what to think.

And now that I've seen it, I'm just like, "Hm. Ok."

After seeing it, one of my friends said that it was an "important movie".

Really?

Can movies be important?

Isn't that really stretching the meaning of the word "important"?

I guess ideas can be important.

Ideas like equality, human (or nonhuman) rights, diplomacy.

Ideas like government, transparency, and State secrets.

But not movies.

And probably not this movie.

Hot Bath vs. Cold Compress

Lock-in? Over.

Lower back? Seriously injured.

Career path? Very much in question.

Ouch.

5:01 p.m.

If you ever find me at Panera, or the coffee shop, or in the office past 5p.m. - it's a pretty safe bet what I'm up to:

That's right - Settlers of Catan.

Part of me (and every part of Abz) wishes that Andrew Neilson had never exposed me to the wonders of Catan - but now my innocence has been stolen. There's no going back.

Have you ever played this game?

It's so stinkin' addictive. And I have such a hard time getting people together to play that I started playing online. Thank goodness it's free, or I would either be broke or divorced.

Your assignment: Go download the client right now, feed your own Catan addiction, and play with me. No kidding.

It's not the years, it's the mileage....

I've got one of those crazy Youth Ministry overnight events tonight.

We're joining with a couple of other churches (Hi, Cory!) to play Broomball at a local ice rink until 1:15, then coming back to our church to play an especially violent version of Dodgeball in the sanctuary.

Will anyone sleep? Who knows.

Will they get pranked if they do? Uh - that's kind of the rule for lock-ins.

What I DO know is that I'm probably too dang old for crap like this.

I mean, sure, it was my idea to do it, and I'm really looking forward to it - but what I'm NOT looking forward to is how I'm going to feel when I have to stumble home at 8:00 in the morning.

I'm currently taking bets on how many days it'll take me to get back to normal afterwards.

My money's on "all of them".

Ah, who am I kidding. There's no such thing as enough sleep.

Abby is having an overnight retreat with some chicks from church, so our poor puppies will be home alone all night.

Wow. As I was writing this, I got really sleepy all of a sudden.

I'm headed home to take a nap...